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Sunday, September 28, 2014

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In Reflection: Worst Gimmicks in Wrestling History

There comes a time in every wrestling fan's life where you reflect..... on the good and the bad. The Attitude Era, the Golden Age, the Ruthless Aggression Era, the Monday Night War Era, the Era of The Extreme, The New Generation Era..... so much greatness within the history of professional wrestling for our time and the most recent generations. Today will not be one of those days that we reflect on the good. Not today, folks. Instead, we will take a look at some of the worst gimmicks and characters in wrestling history. I will not list these gimmicks in order, because it's almost impossible to determine what's the absolute worst(sad I know). Not included on this list? The Shockmaster. Yes, I know, but his debut was so epic while terrible, that I could NOT include him. Sorry, guys. But, without further adieu, let us take a look....................

Johnny B. Badd





This gimmick was absolutely ridiculous. Let's take a look at this shall we? Marc Mero(Merowitz), who I recently found out WASN'T BLACK(this tomfoolery basically made life no longer worth living), played this Little Richard inspired character, who even came out with a Little Richard inspired theme. It was beyond strange to watch a Little Richard ripoff in a wrestling ring. Johnny B. Badd even had some success, winning the TV title, and feuding with Arn Anderson(which I actually enjoyed as a kid). Mero was a talented guy as far as in ring work went, but this gimmick baffles me to this day. This guy was really a Jewish man dressed as a tribute to a black rock and roll legend in professional wrestling. Flamboyant, full of make up and tons of hair products, Johnny B. Badd is one of the worst gimmicks in wrestling history. And this sumbitch isn't even BLACK! The deception.

Nailz 




So this gimmick might not even be remembered much, but man.... was it bad. Nailz has the dubious honor of being one of the true first convict gimmicks to KEEP THE ORANGE JUMPSUIT. Nailz, who had a fairly significant feud with Big Bossman, was not to be taken seriously. The man came out in an ORANGE JUMPSUIT! Not much of note to actually write here, it was just a terrible idea that reeks of Vince saying "it's money, there's a bunch of convicts in the world, how can people not relate, am I right?" and the stooges going "sure, Vince". Terrible.

Kerwin White





This gimmick.............. is just.............. the...... fucking...... drizzling shits. Chavo Guerrero, member of the esteemed Guerrero family was forced(by WWE brass I'd assume) to do this racist/sellout gimmick of a Hispanic conservative golfer who had the catchphrase "If it ain't white, it ain't right" and wore the ridiculous outfit that a 70 year old golfer would. It was embarrassing and degrading on many levels, and I'm still confused on why Chavo would agree to do something like this, considering his heritage and legacy of family, but who knows? Maybe he saw it as a challenge and wanted to try it? I wish he never did. I really wish he never did. One of the saddest gimmicks in history. Just..... TERRIBLE.

"The African Dream" Akeem





This gimmick..... another racist gimmick. If you weren't aware, the One Man Gang was a very recognizable wrestler in the 80s. A pretty big name, so.... It's beyond me why he was put with Slick and giving a gimmick of being an African transplant, with a terrible accent. He also danced badly during some sort of African ritual, and it really was cringe-inducing. WWE has had a lot of gimmicks that are ridiculous, but this was just wrong. I really don't understand the purpose and point, as this never went anywhere, despite having the greatness of Slick attached to it.

Arachnaman





Just look at the pictures. Nothing more needs to be said. The fuck was wrong with WCW? I mean, if I HAD to pick a top 3 or so, this might have to be on it.

The Booty Man, The Zodiac, The Disciple, and all Brutus Beefcake related characters






I don't really have to say much about this here either(look at the photos for God's sake)..... I mean, Brutus Beefcake has a legacy in the wrestling world, and the Barber gimmick is definitely iconic for a generation. But, as the 90s came about, it seemed like he struggled to find a different character to get comfortable with. The Booty Man? Seriously? Coming out to the ring with Kimberly Page is never a bad thing, but what a shitty gimmick. The Zodiac? Are you serious? The Zodiac came back to terrorize Hogan during his Dungeon of Doom feud and ended up terrorizing us with this fucking ridiculous character/gimmick. The Disciple? What was the point? Like... where did this seem like a good idea? Brutus Beefcake in the 90s only had Hogan related characters that made him look silly and it just seems the 90s were not good to him. Tough break.

The Zombie(ECW- The WWE Version)





I realize that ECW was coming to SyFy in 2006. I get it. ECW needed a network to hold all the extreme wrestling and maybe even the blood as well. But, REALLY? A fucking zombie? As a wrestling character? Just because ECW was on SyFy? Bad enough, Kevin Thorn was stuck with a vampire gimmick that really seemed out of place with Sabu, RVD, CM Punk, and others, but now this. This is one of the reasons why the WWE version of ECW was due to fail. The Zombie might actually be the worst gimmick of all time. Possibly. It's definitely up there high. I still can't believe WWE signed off on this character actually making it to TV ever.

Seven




Dustin Runnels is one of the great minds in professional wrestling. The character Goldust became iconic and legendary. It is still around and one of the more recognizable characters today. However............... WCW, WHAT IN THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING? I mean, sweet baby Jesus, what was the point of this? Who saw this character and thought "oh man, this will be money"? I struggle to see that conversation even happening. While I will always respect Dustin Runnels and his contributions to the business, this gimmick is absurd. WCW was headed down the toilet anyways, but this was the confirmation. At least one of the stronger confirmations.

I'm sure you're reading this and thinking "where's Repo Man, Skinner, Mantaur, Bastion Booger, The KISS Demon, The Yeti, and countless others", right? Well, they are definitely some of the absolute worst as well, but I wanted to take time to look at some of the worst gimmicks that don't always get talked about. Regardless, it's very saddening to see how many of these terrible gimmicks came during the 90s, which is heralded as one of the greatest decades(most say the greatest) in wrestling history. Until next time, it's been real guys. Keep living the gimmick...... or don't. 

-TrueGodImmortal

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