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Wednesday, January 24, 2018

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Eyes On Royal Rumble: 5 Bad Matches At The Event

By @TrueGodImmortal


The Royal Rumble has seen a number of great moments and top tier matches, but it's also seen a few bad moments and matches as well. Looking back at  it now, it seems as if there were a lot of bad matches that took place at the January event (30 Man Rumble match aside), so today, I wanted to look at 5 of those matches that were underwhelming at the PPV. Let's take a look.

*Ken Shamrock vs Billy Gunn
Royal Rumble 1999



-The IC Title was on the line, but honestly, this was just a bad idea from the start. Shamrock was not a good wrestler and neither was Billy Gunn, so this match was doomed anyways. The pacing, the storytelling, and everything in between here feels rushed, and honestly, this match could have been at least cut down by 3 to 4 minutes. Shamrock wins the bout, but this match was nothing special at all. There were other bad matches on this card too, but this one sticks out to me.
 
*Scott Steiner vs Triple H
Royal Rumble 2003



-Of course. This match makes the list. Steiner. Triple H. What a match. What a classic. What a..... bunch of bullshit. This was a match that I never wanted to see and as we got to the very end of the contest, I realized why even more. The fact was, Triple H wasn't the man anymore in the ring and he was subpar in most of his matches against lesser talents (Nash, Steiner, Goldberg come to mind), while Steiner was just horrible all around. This match went nearly 20 minutes and it just dragged on and on, until the DQ finish somewhat saved the day. Honestly, I still can't believe this match and feud exists because it's so terrible. I have tried to block the memory out of this slow, boring contest, but as you see.... that changes nothing.

*Brock Lesnar vs Hardcode Holly
Royal Rumble 2004



-I remember this match and thinking "damn that was a bit short", and then I saw the official match time and felt like I was watching a Brock title match today. This match is less than 7 minutes long and it is a glorified squash match. Truthfully, Hardcore Holly deserved a bit more. Honestly, the thing that surprised me the most was that Brock didn't have much of a challenge here and that this was mostly just a filler match that served no purpose. After Holly get in minimal offense, Brock makes quick work of him and moves on. I wish this would have went at least 10 minutes to give the appearance that Hardcore would have won, but that wasn't the case. Simply put, this match is awful.

*The Undertaker vs Heidenreich
Royal Rumble 2005



-A casket match. At the Rumble. What could go wrong? Everything. Taker wasn't his usual self and his competition was a poet. A poet who might assault people in his spare time. Well, add in some interference from Snitsky and Kane, and you get one big clusterfuck of a match that really has aged much worse than even I remembered. Taker couldn't carry him to a good match, and the ending couldn't come soon enough. Taker wins this match, and Heidenreich ends up on a different path (What A Rush...), and their forgettable feud finishes without much fanfare or care.

*Kurt Angle vs Mark Henry
Royal Rumble 2006



-Why did this close the show? I'll never understand. Sure, Undertaker comes back in this match, but this is a horrible way to end the PPV. This match is the main event of a pivotal PPV and I'll be honest, I'm a fan of Mark Henry. However, there was no reason and no point to ever put Mark in the title picture or main event at this time. Angle couldn't make Henry look good in this one, and the match was over in less than 10 minutes, but for all this, you could have just had the Angle vs Taker match at the show and everyone would have been satisfied. Of all the matches on this list, this is one of those that leave me scratching my head at why this CLOSED the show.


-True

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